The following is a transcript of the Scrubs: Interns webisode "Screw You with Ted and the Gooch".
Scene[]
A couch
Sunny: Oh, hi! I'm off today, so no normal episode. But, you know that bald sweaty lawyer guy? I saw him this morning. With a girl. Check this out - I think they like each other!
Insert: Sunny Presents - THAT BALD SWEATY LAWYER & THE GIRL THAT HE'S SWEET ON
Ted and Gooch get on screen. The girl has an ukulele. They begin to sing:
Song transcript:
Stephanie(s): I've got so many questions in my mind.
Ted(t): I've got so many answers to find.
Stephanie: Can you be the man, I've imagined?
Ted: Am I imagical enough for this to happen?
Both (alternating): Because I like you, I like you, I like you, I like you.
Both: And like can lead to like-like, and like-like can lead to love...
Both: Sure as the stars above I'd really like to (s)screw you; (t)kiss you. Oh!
T: Can I be the man you're looking for?
s: Can I be your girl for evermore?
T: I'll try real hard not to lose her.
s: And I'll try to be less of a loser
Both (alternating): Because I like you, I like you, I like you, I like you.
Both: And like can lead to like-like, and like-like can lead to love...
Both: Sure as the stars above I'd really like to (s) kiss you; (t)screw you, (s) screw you; (t)kiss you; (s) kiss you; (t)screw you; (s)
screw you; (t)kiss you;
Both: Screw you!
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