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"My Cookie Pants"
Season Eight, Episode Six ◄►
Directed by Gail Mancuso
Written by Clarence Livingston
Aired January 27, 2009 on

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“I can't imagine what it's like to have cancer, but I bet it sucks.”— Denise

"My Cookie Pants" is the sixth episode of Scrubs' eighth season. J.D. and Denise continue to work on her demeanor. Elliot worries about making a night special for J.D. Dr. Cox tries to decide whether or not to take the Chief of Medicine position.

Synopsis

After Elliot bakes two dozen cookies for herself and J.D., she goes to change into her 'cookie pants', sweatpants with an expandable waist to correspond to the growing stomach. While she is changing, J.D. eats all twelve of his cookies quickly, in an effort to keep them from Turk. As J.D. takes off to work the next morning, they talk about how they haven't had sex yet even through they'd been dating for a week. Elliot promises him that when he gets home that night she will fulfill his wildest fantasy.

Dr. Cox's new job

As he enters Sacred Heart, Cox complains to Kelso that without a Chief of Medicine, the hospital is falling apart. Later, in the cafeteria, Dr. Cox receives a call on his cell phone from the board of directors asking him to come in and interview for the Chief of Medicine job. Jordan is excited to hear the news. Later, Dr. Cox runs into Dr. Kelso, who tells him that the position involves a lot of work and scrutiny. Cox skips his meeting with the board, infuriating Jordan. She talks with Kelso, who later tells Cox that he is going to take the job because he would do it perfectly, and was simply forewarning him of the worst parts of the job. Kelso also reveals that he nominated Cox for the position. At the end of the day, Cox walks out of the conference room as the new Chief of Medicine.

Denise's bedside manner

J.D. and Denise have a patient, Mr. Lawton, who J.D. takes a liking to. After Denise shows some crass bedside manners, J.D. argues with her that she needs to treat her patients nicer. When she suggests ordering a painful procedure on Mr. Lawton, J.D. disagrees. Later, a nurse informs J.D. that Denise ordered the procedure, but as he is yelling at her they find out the procedure found Mr. Lawton to have stomach cancer. J.D. later apologizes to Denise for riding her so hard, and she yells at him and storms out. He later talks to her and tells her that every doctor has a problem they have to conquer. Denise's is not caring at all, while J.D.'s is caring too much. In the end, Denise tries to be nicer to Mr. Lawton, by attempting to console him about his cancer diagnosis.

Elliot's quest for help

Meanwhile, Elliot frantically seeks help from Turk about sexually pleasing J.D.. After discussing some ideas including strangulation and other fetishes, Turk tells her during a surgery, that the reason he and Carla are so connected is that they don't let anything inhibit their feelings. When J.D. returns home he finds Elliot on the bed reading a magazine and states that he finds her incredibly sexy, especially in cookie pants.

Recurring Themes

More: Fantasies • Flashbacks • J.D.'s girl names • Janitor's pranks and lies

Fantasies

Turk gas-bombs Elliot and J.D. and runs in once they fall to the floor and steals their cookies. While the room is still filled with gas, he decides to take off his own mask to risk eating the cookies. Although he also succumbs to the gas, he notes it was "worth it". Turk later steals the cookies for real, while J.D. and Elliot are in bed. Elliot later says that Turk "owes her" for taking the cookies.

Janitor story

Janitor is dressed in surgical kit while an operation is going on, and tries to touch a patient's heart because the lack of Chief of Medicine means he has no one to punish him.
Janitor proves to J.D. a statement that when any angry woman leaves a room, another one will enter.

Guest Stars

Music

♫ List of music featured in Scrubs

"I’d Rather Be With You" by Joshua Radin

Quotes

“Don't worry. A lot of people are afraid of needles. I was only surprised because you're just the first one I've come across that doesn't have a vagina.”— Denise

“Stop throwing dirty clothes at me!”— Elliot

“Stop saying sexy things!”— J.D.

“Don't worry Mr. Haforn, a lot of people are afraid of needles. I was only surprised because you're the first one I've come across that doesn't have a vagina. [Leaves the patient's room] Did you know that guy was a priest?”— Denise

“I did. I'll see you tomorrow. If you're not here I'll just assume that demons dragged you down to hell to chew your face off”— J.D.

“Elliot, are you sick?”— Turk

“No, I just don't have makeup on.”— Elliot

[Looks up]

“That ones for you, pop-pop. He's not dead - he's upstairs, dying”— Janitor

“I need your approval to cut down some lollipop trees outside the seamonkey hut.”— J.D.

“What are you talking about?”— Denise

“These decisions have to go through you because you're the mayor of crazytown.”

“Look, the nurse said Mr. Lawton is having a breakdown about his cancer. I want you to go over there and help him through it.”— J.D.

“You really want me talking to him? If he cries I'm gonna hit him.”— Denise

“I can't imagine what it's like to have cancer, but I bet it sucks.”— Denise

“It totally sucks”— Mr. Lawton

[Denise reluctantly comforts Mr. Lawton by placing her hand on his shoulder]

“You all right?”— Mr. Lawton

“Yeh, I'll get through it.”— Denise

Trivia

Judy Reyes does not appear in this episode.
The tune J.D. plays on the piano mat is "Superman", the Scrubs Theme Song.
Mr. Cookie Pants was the name of the Puppet owned by Dr. David Norris in "My White Whale".

SEASON EIGHT EPISODES
1. "My Jerks" 2. "My Last Words" 3. "My Saving Grace" 4. "My Happy Place" 5. "My ABC's" 6. "My Cookie Pants"	7. "My New Role" 8. "My Lawyer's in Love" 9. "My Absence" 10. "My Comedy Show" 11. "My Nah Nah Nah" 12. "Their Story II"	13. "My Full Moon" 14. "My Soul on Fire, Part 1" 15. "My Soul on Fire, Part 2" 16. "My Cuz" 17. "My Chief Concern" 18. "My Finale"
Episodes: 1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5 • 6 • 7 • 8 _w • 9