My Common Enemy
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My Common Enemy | |
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Written by Bill Callahan Air Date - October 19, 2004 on  DVD • iTunes • Syndication | |
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- “Dear God, she has an actual skip in her step.”— Dr. Cox on Molly
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[edit] Synopsis
Ever since Turk discovered that he has Type II Diabetes, he has been using the disease as an excuse to get pre-prepared food from Carla. However, his selfishness comes back to haunt him, as he discovers that Carla has been promoted to Administrative Supervisor, which pays an extra $7,000 a year, but turns it down because she wants more time to take care of Turk. Overwhelmed with guilt, Turk convinces Dr. Kelso to re-offer her the job by agreeing to kill the bat that has been hibernating in Kelso's attic. Shortly thereafter, he confesses to Carla about using his diabetes as a gimmick, but she turns down the job again anyway. This forces Carla to confess that she never actually wanted the job because she wanted to continue working with patients, so she used Turk's diabetes as an excuse to turn it down.
After the death of Sam Dorian, Dan has been spending his time with J.D. at his apartment. Elliot has been spending a lot of time with him, under the impression of consolation. However, when resting in the on-call room, JD finds both Dan and Elliot kissing in the bunk beneath him. Initially, he admits that the discovery doesn't bother him, but Turk convinces him to use the information to his advantage, in hopes that it will guilt Elliot into forgiving him for the painful break up they had to endure since Turk and Carla's wedding. The plan works, and Elliot ends up breaking up with Dan. However, JD later finds the break up to be a hoax. Both JD and Elliot discover that the reason Elliot's relationship with Dan doesn't bother either of them is because they no longer had intimate feelings for each other. This discovery ostensibly leads to the reparation of their friendship.
When Dr. Molly Clock refuses to fill an order for anti-depressants for Dr. Kelso's wife (at his request) because Dr. Kelso deceptively slips the drugs into his wife's food without her knowing (because they kill Enid's sex drive as a side effect), Dr. Cox makes a snide remark her way. Dr. Clock replies that she doesn't believe that Dr. Kelso can be all bad, despite Dr. Cox's assertions to the affirmative. When Dr. Kelso offers Dr. Clock a Spanish to English Dictionary as a gift to keep her mouth shut about the medicine, Dr. Cox reveals to Dr. Kelso that, in doing this kind gesture, he is confirming Dr. Clock's persistent belief that people are all benevolent. In order to prove that people are "bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling", the two decide to systematically break her spirit. Dr. Kelso concludes that the best way to do it is to keep her from going to her mom's wedding. Despite their efforts, she takes the news well. However, they later find her in the parking lot, crying, and they feel remorseful. They admit their cruel intentions, thus proving Dr. Clock's original notion that all people do have good in them.
[edit] Plot Points
- J.D. gets annoyed that Elliot and Dan have started a relationship.
- Turk regrets using diabetes to his advantage to get food from Carla.
- Dr. Cox and Dr. Kelso try to stop Molly from being so happy.
[edit] Recurring Themes
[edit] Fantasies
- J.D. and Elliot stand in front of each other naked, but have no romantic feelings for each other at all, and just stand there.
[edit] Flashbacks
- Kelso lining Enid's Fig Newtons with Anti-depressants.
- The bat in Kelso's attic grappling with Baxter and biting his ear off.
[edit] Janitor Story
As J.D. walks by, Janitor mentions that to Dr. Cox that if J.D. was with them that he would show an example of how he tortures him. J.D. walks away fast, relieved that he wasn't seen, although the Janitor senses that "he's near".
[edit] Episode Running Gags
- Whenever Dan says something like, "since my dad's death" or "my dad died," J.D. will correct him by saying "our dad."
[edit] Guest Stars
- Thomas Cavanagh as Dan Dorian
- Heather Graham as Molly Clock
- Sam Lloyd as Theodore Buckland
- Gabrielle Allan as Glenda
- Tiffany Cade as Mary
[edit] Music
- "Andy Griffith Theme" by the Andy Griffith Show
- "Move On" by Jet
- "Take Off" by Tart
- "Thank You" by Dido
[edit] Quotes
- “Why are you whistling, Ted? Your life is pathetic.”— Dr. Kelso
- “Cookie racism aside, I had bigger problems.”— J.D.
- “You know on The Sopranos if a guy caught his brother with his ex-girlfiend, he'd just rub his ass out.”— Turk
- “Oh believe you me, the second I get Dan alone there's gonna be some serious ass rubbing...I shouldn't smack talk.”— J.D.
- “Perry, no one is pure evil. I mean, yes, everyone has a hard outer shell, but inside everybody has a creamy center...”— Molly
- “There are plenty of people here on this particular planet that are hard on the outside and hard on the inside...”— Dr. Cox
- “There are plenty of people here on this particular planet that are hard on the outside and hard on the inside...”— Dr. Cox
- “So they'd have more of a nougaty center?”
- “Lady, people aren't chocolates, do you know what they are mostly? Bastards...bastard coated bastards with bastard fillings, but I don't find them half as annoying as I find naive bubble headed optimists who walk around vomiting sunshine...”
- “Lady, people aren't chocolates, do you know what they are mostly? Bastards...bastard coated bastards with bastard fillings, but I don't find them half as annoying as I find naive bubble headed optimists who walk around vomiting sunshine...”
- “I'm touching your creamy center!”
- “Ooh...I am so very angry...that I'm going to find someone to kill just to prove her wrong.”
- “Ooh...I am so very angry...that I'm going to find someone to kill just to prove her wrong.”
- “Well how would you feel if I hooked up with one of your siblings?”— J.D.
- “A little confused considering I have four brothers. But not surprised - at you or Barry.”— Elliot
- “A little confused considering I have four brothers. But not surprised - at you or Barry.”— Elliot
- “Don't you think you're overreacting?”— J.D.
- “No, J.D., I don't, because Elliot was the best thing that ever happened to me and now she's gone. [singing badly] Ahhhh... she's gone! She's gone. She's... gone! She's gone... she's gone.”— Dan
- “No, J.D., I don't, because Elliot was the best thing that ever happened to me and now she's gone. [singing badly] Ahhhh... she's gone! She's gone. She's... gone! She's gone... she's gone.”— Dan
- “That's not even the right gibberish!”
- “Turns out you can't go to your mom's wedding. There's too much shift-switching going on here and I don't like shift-switching. It's too hard to say!”— Dr. Kelso
- “Dan was in my tub for four hours, drinking beers and singing "She's Gone."”— J.D.
- “How do you take a bath?”— Dan
- “How do you take a bath?”— Dan
- “You okay?”— J.D.
- “No. Sometimes I wish I'd never gotten this stupid diabetes!”— Turk
- “No. Sometimes I wish I'd never gotten this stupid diabetes!”— Turk
- “Hey! Let's not get crazy!”
[edit] Trivia
- The tune Molly is whistling is the theme from "The Andy Griffith Show".
- The Dido album Dan bought is called Life For Rent, however the song playing in Elliot's apartment, Thank You, is from her debut album, also called Thank You.
[edit] Images
Dr. Kelso puts anti-depressants in Enid's food. |
Carla brings Turk some diabetes biscuits |
 Dr. Cox and Dr. Kelso try to make Molly upset |
 Dan and Elliot on J.D.'s scooter |
Ted whistling because of Molly's contagious happiness |
Molly leaves the hospital, wearing a very large hat |
Dan singing "She's Gone" very badly |
